Be the bachelor(ette)💋 not a contestant

We love reality television. Not so much for the colorful content that allows us to shut our brains off, but for the wealth of material it offers to help us explain how the retail real estate process works.

So in today’s episode newsletter, we’ll turn to Selling Sunset and The Bachelor* because even though Selling Sunset is the show about real estate, you actually want to approach your retail real estate deal like you’re on The Bachelor.

In Selling Sunset (and residential real estate), successful tours always end with, “if you want this house, you need to put in an offer today because tomorrow might be too late!” There is time pressure to commit NOW lest you lose the opportunity entirely. 

Commercial real estate, on the other hand, is a lot more like The Bachelor. The selection and “commitment” process takes place over 10 episodes…10 weeks…about the time it takes to negotiate an LOI.

This mindset shift can be tough for first timers, since the urge to fall in love and choose quickly is what we’re used to in residential real estate AND there is a very real sense that if I don’t match quickly, I may not match at all. 

So if finding the right retail space is like being on The Bachelor, tell me this – who would you rather be? The bachelor or a contestant? The bachelor, obviously, and not just because you’d have amazing abs. You want to be the bachelor because you want to do the picking, and you don’t want to wait around the house all day drinking wine in a plastic tumbler waiting for someone to deliver a letter that tells you if you get to go on the adventure date.

The bachelor spends the episodes getting to know the contestants through painful/flirty chit chat and “fun” activities that involve dress-up and horses. As viewers, we don’t even bother to learn the contestants’ names until we’re a few weeks in. The stakes are LOW for many weeks while the bachelor figures out which contestants seem promising.

Eventually the bachelor gets all misty-eyed, looks into the San Bernadino sunset and laments having to “choose between so many great people,” but does anyone really think he feels that bad? No. He’s not personally invested in anyone (yet), and the whole point is to narrow the field.

The contestants, on the other hand, are ALL IN from the moment they step out of the limo. They’ve never spoken to this guy – they’ve only seen a headshot and imagined his abs – but they have no real sense of compatibility or even tolerability. But they know one thing for sure – if they don’t get a rose, they’re going back to Tampa and their job as a pharma rep. The stakes are HIGH from the get-go. 

Do you ever see a contestant saying, “damn, this dude is a moron,” or “did you hear him talk about his militia membership?!” No. Instead they say, “ugh, he’s so playful” and “I love that he’s so protective and patriotic.” 

Do we seriously think that these contestants don’t notice the red flags? Not at all. We just know that if THEY self select out, they’re gone, and their journey ends here. They’re ignoring the red flags because they want to stay in the game. They want to be chosen. They don’t want to be rejected.

And when they’re eventually left standing alone on the little tiered platform without a rose, it’s a sad sight. In the early episodes it’s not so bad, but once someone’s been around for a few weeks, things can get really ugly. Tears. Anger. Guttural wails. All captured in an uplit courtyards and contractually mandatory "confessionals."
 

When you’re looking for the right retail space, the entire experience is a lot easier when you have choices…when you can take your time figuring out which space and deal is right…when there’s a lot of activity, and when landlords are doing the bend-and-snap for YOU. Life is easier when you’re The Bachelor in your own reality show.

In real reality, there are some circumstances where you can’t help but be the contestant. If your business requires super specific site criteria, or a narrow target market, or annoyingly limited licensing requirements, you may find yourself negotiating only one LOI. That does happen, and it’s not always a terrible thing. But if you can avoid limiting your options by being curious and keeping an open mind to spaces that maybe don’t appear perfect at first glance, you’ll enjoy the freedom of choice and oftentimes discover that a space is a lot more attractive once you get to know it a little better.

Also, great news, being discerning and taking your time makes you MUCH more attractive to everyone in your life.

* Yes, I know there is a Bachelorette, but The Bachelor is the OG and it’s one syllable and four fewer letters to type. I think you know by now that misogyny isn’t our vibe here.